Dear Fox News: Where in the hell is my Joy Behar coverage!

FOX News Channel
1211 Avenue of the Americas
New York, NY 10036

Dear Fox News,

Where in the name of holy fuck is my Joy Behar news! You heartless bastards have gone DAYS without mentioning J-Beh. And let me tell you, that is bullshit. Complete and total bullshit.

First of all, you just get someone hooked on Joy Behar, and then yank her away. You’re a Joy tease, that’s what you are, Fox News. I admit that at first I thought Joy Behar was a talentless loser that had lucked into a good gig on “The View.” But due to your tireless work on the Behar front, Fox News, I have learned she is so much more than that. She must be to get the coverage you gave her.

Gerald Ford dies?! Saddam to be hung?! Hundreds daily need to be scraped off the pavement in Iraq?! Why on earth would Fox News think this matters to their readers?

We want Behar. Tell us again how that mischievous skamp called Donald Rumsfeld a Hitler. Tell us how she interviewed Hillary Clinton. Tell us what her thoughts are on Mel Gibson. Tell us how she feels about Fox News. Give us something for Christ’s sake!

Let’s get this straight, Fox News: You are here to keep J-Beh fans informed. Joy Behar is the voice of this generation, and if you don’t cover her antics, who will? No one, that’s who. No one else cares about her, only you.

So, Fox News, get back to work. Us “Joysters” need you to do your job, and keep the nation flooded with breaking Beharian updates. Don’t let us down again.

Hugs,

William K. Wolfrum

–WKW