In a post regarding Bill Moyers holding the flame over the elite Washington media, here’s a perfect line from Digby:
Political journalism in America has mostly become an elaborate kabuki dance.
Spot on. Read more here.
–WKW
L.A. Times sportswriter Mike Penner has an announcement:
During my 23 years with The Times’ sports department, I have held a wide variety of roles and titles. Tennis writer. Angels beat reporter. Olympics writer. Essayist. Sports media critic. NFL columnist. Recent keeper of the Morning Briefing flame.
Today I leave for a few weeks’ vacation, and when I return, I will come back in yet another incarnation.
As Christine.
I am a transsexual sportswriter. It has taken more than 40 years, a million tears and hundreds of hours of soul-wrenching therapy for me to work up the courage to type those words. I realize many readers and colleagues and friends will be shocked to read them.
Best of luck and an untold amount of respect to the soon-to-be Christine Daniels. The courage shown will undoubtedly be a huge inspiration to many. Good luck, Christine, you have a lot to be proud of and a lot of new friends.
Read more about Mike Penner’s wonderfully written tale of his journey to become Christine Daniels by clicking here.
–WKW
There are a lot of great things about the Internet, but very likely the best part of it is that movie stars feel it necessary to have their own Web pages. Like Melanie Griffith’s “Avalon” where we get to find out once and for all that Griffith actually lives inside her own demented Harlequin romance novel.
Of course, Griffith has nothing on Jeff Bridges. But five minutes into looking at JeffBridges.com you’ll come to a startling discovery - “The Big Lebowski” was a documentary. The Dude is real.
Everywhere you look on JeffBridges.com, you’ll find Bridge’s own artwork (translation: doodles). You’ll also find a personal note from Bridges on first page:
Some dude has been posing as me on the guestbook & message board. I don’t plan to communicate that way so an postings from ‘me’ on there are fake. Please use good netiquette, guys.
So get that through your head right off the bat and there will be no problems. You can enjoy Jeff’s site, but Jeff won’t be hanging out or writing to you.
After that, the Web site has several sections. You can peruse info on the 87,000 films Bridges has been in (Dude’s busy. Really busy) or you can find out how to buy Bridge’s album “Be Here Soon.” All the while enjoying some random doodles Bridges jotted off while eating his corn flakes.
The “Stuff” section is particularly interesting, and includes more artwork linking to what are apparently some of Bridges favorite sites, including an odd Java game called Pass the Pigs, a link to a video of juggler Chris Bliss, Bridges’ own illustrations to the John Irving short story “The Door in the Floor,” a link to LebowskiFest.com (”A celebration of all things Lebowski”) and a link to a 2005 BBC story of a woman jailed for ripping off a dude’s left testicle. Among other things.
There’s also the Message Board that, while Bridges assures us he never plans to post on, somehow gets an irrational amount of attention, including one never-ending thread from someone named Cecile who is in an all-out war against the Scientologists that are tracking them (and Cecile even supplies the license plate numbers of the vans following him).
Here’s a sample from Cecile, who sometimes doesn’t even bother with translating and posts in French:
It is well explained i think in all my messages specially in “Tom Cruise stronger than democracy in Europe”?
If you want this website site is where the journalists i am in contact with (in the states and eu) are watching. They know my real identity.
I think it was a big mistake of us administration to accept to consider a nazi organization a “religion” and then scientology can benefit from tax exemption and recycle money via production (that is why Nicole Kidman made a petition against scientology tax exemption). Hope i have managed to explain. I’d say Jeff is not a nazi. He can contact the Washington Post and the New York times (and else), they know about me.
If i am not here , i will go else where. I just find here friendly if you don’t mind.
Actually the pic upload which could help me at its worst staying alive does work. Technology is obviously stronger than democracy.
Then, as is to be expected, there’s the “Do plants communicate with us?” thread.
Bridges also has a link to his own End Hunger Network displayed prominently. Overall, it’s probably safe to say that, for a movie star, Bridges seems like a good enough guy. Of course, it’s also safe to assume one other thing - Jeff Bridges is, in fact, The Dude. And being The Dude is enough for at least 100 or so to think he’s up to the job of being President of the United States of America.
To: Jeff Bridges and U.S. Congress
We, assembled fans of actor and activist Jeff Bridges move that he run for president in the 2008 United States election. While we recognize that playing the president of the United States in a movie (The Contender, 2000) does not necessarily prepare one for actually being president of the United States, it probably doesn’t hurt. Moreover, Bridges’ role as “The Dude” in the Big Lebowski (1998) has been presumed to be somewhat evocative of the actor’s real-life personality (he even wore his own clothes in the movie), and we firmly believe that “The Dude” would make an excellent figurehead of our troubled nation. Additionally, Mr. Bridges has proven himself capable of worthy leadership and compassion in establishing his “End Hunger Network” charity. Therefore, we nominate Mr. Bridges as candidate for president in the 2008 United States election, to run under any political party he chooses. In summing up: Run for president, Dude!
So head on over to JeffBridges.com and see for yourself if The Dude is capable of running the free world. He couldn’t do a worse job than the guy doing it now, and the world would be a much trippier place.
–WKW
Tom DeLay, living in his own secret world of Nazis and traitors, went off on Harry Reid and Nacy Pelosi, accusing them of treason, saying he knew it was true because he “looked it up while we were driving over here, what the definition of treason is.”
And then on Tucker Carlson’s MSNBC show, Carlson, Pat Robertson and A.B. Stoddard had fun mocking him.
“It’s amazing. It used to be oh, how the mighty have fallen, and now it’s oh, how the might have fallen and gone out on book tour,” said Stoddard.
Luckily for DeLay, the crazy-eyes, “I’m a dangerous nutcase” thing works quite well in prison. Until then, he’s a fun laughingstock to have around.
Check the video here at Crooks and Liars.
–WKW
A Google search has shown that I still have light years to go to catch the most famous Wolfrum. At this point, it appears obvious that the most famous Wolfrum is …
Walter Wolfrum (born May, 23 1923 in Schmölz, Germany), was a German World War II fighter ace who served in the Luftwaffe from February 1943 until the end of the war. He is credited with 137 confirmed kills.
So there’s good news and bad news. The bad news: The most famous Wolfrum was a Nazi pilot. The good news: He was a bad-ass pilot.
–WKW
From The Daily Show:
Jon Stewart: “So what do you want to start with, the bomb Iran song, or the walk through the market in Baghdad? What do you want to start with?”
John McCain: “Which one have I seen most on your show? I think maybe shopping in Baghdad. I had something really picked out for you, it’s a nice little IED to put under your desk.”
Jon Stewart: “That’s very nice. That’s why we have the dogs here.”
John McCain: “By the way, the dog wasn’t there, Chloe. I wanted to kick it on my way in.”
Terrorist acts and dog kicking. Comedy gold for any Presidential candidate.
–WKW
It is becoming more apparent that Iraqi leaders, tired of micromanaging a civil war and waiting on an artificial timetable, are about ready to call it a day.
Iraqi politicians — frustrated by violence throughout the country and the glacial pace of parliamentary lawmaking — say the nearly one-year-old government is failing.
Iraqi lawmakers told CNN the government’s impotence and inability to bring peace to the chaotic environment is basically structural, and not the product of Prime Minister Nuri al-Maliki.Mahmoud Othman, a Kurdish legislator, was quoted in the USA Today newspaper as describing al-Maliki as weak, but in an interview with CNN, he said, “It’s not Maliki, it’s the whole government.”
That government, he said, is failing on many fronts, such as providing security, fostering reconciliation and offering public services.
“The president has a choice to make in the coming days: Cling to the discredited policies that have led our troops further into an intractable civil war or work with a bipartisan majority of Congress to make us more secure,” Democratic Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid said.
Sadly, that choice has been made. With the Iraqi government in its final throes, as it were, President George W. Bush has made up his mind, and his mind doesn’t get changed regardless of silly things like facts or reality - he’s following the Pre-9/11 PNAC dream of American world domination to the very end. Of course, that just means the end to the lives of more American troops, and countless more Iraqis. All the while creating more terrorists and making the “Greatest Nation on Earth” look more and more foolish, arrogant and dangerous.
The plan is “not working,” according to Maysoon al-Damalouji, a secular Sunni lawmaker.
She said many people believed that services would be restored to neighborhoods “cleansed” by U.S. and Iraqi troops. However, once troops leave a cleansed region, militias move back in and take revenge on people who have cooperated with the troops.
Al-Damalouji believes that the essential problem is the division of parties by sectarian affiliation.
Such talk of sects and such doesn’t fly in American political discourse, however.
“The minute you start listing the circumstances under which you’re going to pull out you start talking about defeat,” Rudy Giuliani said. “What we have to achieve in Iraq is a government and a situation that acts as a bulwark against terrorism rather than as an encouragement for them — and then you’ve got to figure out the strategies to get you there and make them work.”
With that government apparently on its way out, the last “bulwark” against the tactic of terrorism is to continually send Americans into the meat grinder in some delusional battle on the frontline of Iraq.
So while the Democratic Party steadfastly attempts to put an end to this war of self-defeat, it’s obvious that circumstances on the ground are completely meaningless. Bush and his PNAC brain trust want a “clean bill” to stay in Iraq as long as possible. And as the Iraqi government steps down, that could be a very, very long time if the neocons continue to run things.
–WKW
I have an unshakable belief in my head: If offered enough money, Fox News commando Bill O’Reilly would blow a goat on national television. And I’m not just talking about the act. If enough money was involved, O’Reilly would take the goat out for a nice dinner, maybe buy it some lingerie, and then take it home and blow it. All with the cameras rolling.
I’m thinking George Soros would enjoy spending some of his money this way. I figure maybe $10 million should do it. O’Reilly makes tons of money dis-educating seniors, so it would have to be a chunk. So yeah, $10 million should have him fellating a goat in no time.
After all, according to O’Reilly, Soros is behind everything from the Virginia Tech murders to why President Bush’s master planning is failing so horrifyingly in Iraq. So, if that’s really the case - and woe to whomever denies the truth of what O’Reilly says - then I think he’d pitch in a little to have O’Reilly stuffed with goat dick.
I look forward to a day when the chart above has one more arrow, pointing directly to Soros to “O’Reilly blows goat.” That will be a glorious day. And it shouldn’t be hard to make this happen. Soros gives to plenty of causes, and O’Reilly is a soul-less whore. We can make this happen.
–WKW
Dear God/Jesus/Allah/Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy/etc.,
Hey guys, Bill here. I know I spend most my time denying your existence and all, but, like many atheists, I come running to you when I need some help.
So here’s what I was thinking. The U.S. is currently being run by people completely out of touch with the population and reality. They’re so out of touch, in fact, that they refuse even to speak with Sheryl Crow. Exactly, that Sheryl Crow.
So what I need from you guys is this: I need an old-fashioned haunting. You know, like in “A Christmas Carol.” We need lessons learned is what we need, guys. Take George W. Bush. Here’s a guy who actually stood in front of the White House Correspondents’ Dinner and said “In light of this tragedy at Virginia Tech, I decided not to be funny.”
Now, obviously the victims of Virginia Tech deserve respect and deserved to be honored, but do you see the sickness of Bush’s statement and decision? First of all, there are the two or three people that just live for W’s standup. These are the same people who will buy anything Dane Cook produces.
More importantly, however, is this - there are U.S. soldiers dying daily in an occupation Bush desired and started. Now, my thought is this: Bush isn’t actually aware that U.S. soldiers are dying in Iraq every single day. He doesn’t speak of them, we aren’t allowed to see pictures of them returning to the country, and he never attends funerals for any of them. Hell, he even refused to look for a U.S. soldier after he was kidnapped. Honestly, I don’t think he really knows they exist, except for when they stand behind them when he gives speeches.
So, if it’s possible, could you send a ghost to Bush in the middle of the night and maybe show him some dead and mangled bodies of U.S. soldiers. I’d advise throwing in some dead Iraqi children for him to look at, but I swear to … um, you … that the dude could really care less about them. It would probably make him feel victorious, actually. So focus on the dead Americans. Nine more died today, actually.
Maybe take him to see the grieving families. Perhaps you can take him into the future and show him how things would have been if he hadn’t have sent so many of America’s best to their death in the Middle East. Make some scary “ooooohhh” and “ahhhhh” sounds. That should help.
One thing to note, however: If the rumors are true that Bush is a drunk, broken man whose wife has left him, you may need to repeat the hauntings. They may not take after 14 shots of Jaegermeister. So be persistent. Maybe give him some coffee before you start.
I really would appreciate your help on this, you guys. We’ve tried just about everything on this guy, and it’s just not taking. He just keeps reciting the same things as if on a loop. Bush says he’s fighting a war just for you guys. So it’s up to you to put on your scariest sheet with eyeholes cut out, say a few “ooga-boogas” and tell him to stop it.
Or at very least, get him to at least notice the dead soldiers piling up under his orders. He is in his own bizzarro-world version of the “Sixth Sense” where he can’t see dead people. He needs your help. We need your help.
I’ve been pretty clear in the past that I don’t believe in any of you, but if you can do this, you’ll definitely have a convert. Getting Bush to actually see the carnage he’s created would be a miracle far surpassing any of John Paul II’s “He-swam-five-minutes-after-eating-and-didn’t-drown” miracles.
So do this and I will be a tithing, non-pork-eating convert. In fact, if you act now, I’ll try and stop eating shellfish. Make George Bush see the realities of the war he created. We’ve given it our best shot down here and it’s not working. We need your help. Scare him shitless.
Regards,
–WKW
Crossposted at Shakesville
At least we can all agree on this: Anyone who gets angry when touched by Sheryl Crow is evil to the depths of their soul.
–WKW