1.) It is very stressful to pretend you were/are in the military when in reality the closest you’ve ever come to real battle is watching ‘Red Dawn’ like 35 times.

2.) It takes a brilliantly creative mind to come up with names for liberals like moonbats and libloons, doesn’t that warrant a bonus or something?

3.) While creating Straw Men is a drain on one’s brain power maintaining the level of hypocrisy needed to accuse liberals of doing so is just too much for these poor trolls to bear living on a diet of cheetos and Pepsi alone. They are in need of some solid nutrition, are you listening Power Bar?

Here are these poor slobs defending themselves from the Chickenhawk label for hours on end and nobody appreciates them enough to support their right to unionize. Truly, the trolls are the most persecuted class of people in America today. My heart just aches for them.