The Pittsburgh Steelers will win the Super Bowl
To many, the result seems inevitable. The unbeatable New England Patriots, in a blinding show of unbeatableness, will blast through the playoffs, destroy everyone and win the Super Bowl 176-0. Randy Moss will catch 14 touchdown passes, Tom Brady will be named as a Presidential candidate for both parties, and the NFL will announce that there will no longer be a point to play Super Bowls anymore and the league is just going to fold up.
And yeah, it’s possible. But it won’t happen. The Patriots will never make it to 17-0.
That’s because the Pittsburgh Steelers will beat the Jacksonville Jaguars and turn around and just plain thump the Pats. It will be a blowout of legendary proportions. The children of our children’s children will talk about the Patriots, “who lost 48-0 at home to Pittsburgh Steelers after a perfect season. Yeah, a perfect season. That was before the team was disbanded for general criminality and behavior unbecoming of humans, of course”
Yes, kids of the future will have long, descriptive dialogues about events past, and this will be one of them.
And the Steelers will go on to win the Super Bowl and go down in history as a team that was just so much cooler than the Patriots who were really a bunch of fatheads and treasonists and just jerks in general and if they win the Super Bowl they should be sent to Iraq if they’re so special. Let them solve that, then they can play again. Jerks.
But anyway, it’ll go down like that. I’ve been wrong before, but not this time. The Steelers will come together and shock the nation. And the entire U.S. for once and for all be able to spell “Roethlisberger.” As in, two-time Super Bowl champion Ben Roethlisberger.
–WKW
January 3rd, 2008 at 10:56 am
Very cheeky blog entry. You had me going for a sentence or two when you talked about how the Patriots would be stopped. Thankfully, for me and my gullibility, you went on further.
Btw, I enjoy your sense of humor throughout this blog. I have spent a couple nights, on non-separate occasions, reading your archives. Good stuff.
January 3rd, 2008 at 11:54 am
I appreciate that o’really.
I really believe though. If I can’t believe, how can the team. It’s that simple. I do have some excuses already sketched out, but I totally believe.
Niçç