Other works from a struggling Internet writer

Hey Kids, this is your pal Bill! Being a writer on the Internet, my life is a non-stop battle to keep my keyboard crumb free and keep my blood pressure under 275/190. It’s also a life of hustle and shameless self-promotion.

So, if you don’t mind, let me self-promote a bit. I am still a golf writer of some note, which is impressive considering how rarely I actually write about golf. Here are a few recent golf-related submissions that I believe will resonate with those that love golf and sports, as well as those who don’t:

“John McCain leads Barack Obama in official poll of golf-club throwers”

“Over the past several months of campaigning, voters have been vetted on all categories and demographics. Polls have been conducted that have examined the voting preference of citizens based on race, sex, earnings, religious beliefs and numerous other seemingly random demographics.

A recent BadGolfer.com survey takes this polling to the golf courses of America, and finds that John McCain has a substantial lead over Barack Obama among one important demographic – golf-club throwers.

According to the poll, McCain won big with voters prone to hurling their golf clubs in fits of on-course rage, with 82 percent saying, or shouting, that they supported McCain, compared with just 12 percent supporting Obama. The remaining 6 percent chased away the pollsters and threatened physical violence.”

Read More.

“Barack Obama to team with Tiger Woods Design in building ultra-exclusive golf resorts”

“Early this week, however, Obama campaign spokesman Bill Burton unleashed a bombshell strategy that promises to not just shake up the 2008 U.S. Presidential campaign but also the entire United States economy.

Barack Obama has signed a long-term contract with Tiger Woods Design to design golf courses around the globe.

“This was the next logical step for Sen. Obama,” said Burton. “We saw exactly how much money Dubai was paying Tiger Woods to design a golf course, and we knew that with Sen. Obama’s international popularity this was something we needed to do.”

While the announcement that Obama will simultaneously design golf courses while continuing to campaign for the presidency – and continue afterward either as the President or Senator – will likely be met with skepticism, Burton pointed out all the positives.

“The numbers being tossed around for Sen. Obama to create his own signature golf courses are mind-boggling,” said Burton. “And every cent he earns will be used to offset the national debt, as well as create a national healthcare system.”

Read More.

“Taking my cue from the LPGA: Speak the language or get lost”

“De acordo com a GolfWeek, membros do LGPA serão obrigados a dar entrevistas em inglês sem auxílio de tradutores. Quem não conseguir, terá sua associação suspendida.

Essa nova regra é direcionada aos jogadores sul-coreanos do LGPA. Atualmente, existem 45 sul-coreanos jogando golfe no LPGA Tour.

Então, graças a essas novas normas, que somente enfatizam fatores que nadam tem haver com habilidades referentes ao golfe, o LPGA está se colocando em uma posição que excluirá as melhores jogadoras de golfe do mundo.”

Read More.

Thank you for your patience and understanding.

–WKW