Bilolz

Conservatism has been a part of humanity since the first human did something and then was convinced that they should always do that thing the same exact way forever.

lolz.

While Modern Conservatism paid lip service to the Symbolic Conservative ideology of yesteryear, it rapidly became clear what this reformed ideology truly stood for – winning elections no matter what and “getting paid.” While Conservatism enjoyed dizzying highs, the last few decades saw it evolve into an out-of-control, angry, money-hungry ideology that left many of its followers clutching to guns and religion for comfort.

QFTZ lolz.

“Being a reforming Maverick, I’ve never been a Conservative, so its death has no effect on my history as a POW,” said John McCain in a statement prepared by 173 lobbyists.

Super lolz.

McCain then accused Democratic Presidential nominee Barack Obama as being the “most Conservative Candidate to ever run for President.” For his part, Obama expressed doubts about the reported death of his rival ideology.

Unprecedented super lolz x2.

Not since Jesus left the GOP have I had so many lolz.

But there is one little glitch:

Long-time Conservative hardliners like Dick Cheney, George Allen and Lady Lynn Forester de Rothschild.