Prophet Muhammad endorses John McCain
MECCA — Republican Presidential hopeful John McCain won an important endorsement Monday as popular Muslim Prophet Muhammad said he believes the Arizona Senator has the temperament, attitude and ability to bring the United States the change it so desperately needs.
“John McCain’s track record is proven,” said Muhammad, author of the best-selling book ‘Qur’an.’ “McCain’s work in the Senate has helped Islam more than anyone I know, and with him as U.S. President I’d see that continuing.
“Plus, hey, I know what it’s like have ex-wives and to marry for political reasons,” added Muhammad.
While Muhammad has generally stayed out of the world’s political affairs, his surrogates have often supported U.S. Republicans, including the group once known as “Muslims for Bush.” Muhammad said that more and more, U.S. Conservatives support Islamic beliefs.
“Modern U.S. Conservative philosophies are really right in line with everything Islam stands for,” said Muhammad, pointing to the work of such Republican stalwarts as Rush Limbaugh and Pat Buchanan. “They’re doing all the groundwork for us. It’s really only a matter of time before they all convert.”
Despite the endorsement, the Islamic Prophet said he was concerned about McCain’s campaign strategy.
“What’s up with the Bill Ayers thing, anyway?” asked a puzzled Muhammad, sipping on an Orange Julius in Midtown Mecca. “Seriously, they need to let that go. And for Allah’s sake, let Sarah Palin answer some questions already. She’s a pistol, that one.”
Muhammad added that, whoever wins the U.S. Presidency, he hoped for closer relations between the U.S. and Middle Eastern nations.
“We need to work together, despite the fact that American Christians will burn in eternal hell,” said Muhammad, laughing. “Nah, I’m just messing with you. I get misrepresented a lot, but I’m pretty much down with whatever.
“Except Scientologists. Seriously, what’s up with them? Thetans? It’s a joke, right?” asked Muhammad.
–WKW
October 15th, 2008 at 3:29 pm
That was great. Another winner from WKW.
And my, aren’t major historic religious figures active this political season?
October 16th, 2008 at 10:09 am
[…] As a Presidential candidate, John McCain brings a lot to the table. His experience in a Vietnam prison camp showcased his inner strength and bravery. His experience as a Washington insider showcases his ability to survive the rough and tumble game of politics. His ability to charm the media showcases his talent for getting out his message, whatever it is at any time. But more than anything else, he has the one intangible that makes him the perfect Republican candidate for President: […]