Great Wolfrums of the 21st Century
February 12, 2009
Having long-ago passed Walter Wolfrum as the most important Wolfrum in the history of Wolfrums (sorry, Uwe and Rüdiger), I feel it’s compulsory for me to recognize important Wolfrums in the world today.
So today’s honoree: Logan Wolfrum.
Logan is a versatile 6-2 prep basketball player who is averaging 16.7 points and nearly seven rebounds per game for Ayersville (Ohio) High School. An 82 percent shooter from the free-throw line, Logan is hitting nearly 40 percent of his shots from behind the three-point arc, as well. Add to that the fact that he showcases the type of work ethic we Wolfrums are world-renowned for:
“He’s worked hard to get to the point where he is at right now,” said coach Marv Retcher. “He’s done a lot of work over the summer. You just don’t get to be as good of a player as he is without working and paying the price over the summer.”
So hats off to Logan Wolfrum. Yet another stellar Wolfrum making the name proud. And go Pilots.
–WKW
No one expects a blogaround X
February 12, 2009
Happy Darwin Day, everyone! Enjoy some cake and punch, but most importantly – Evolve! Evolve now, people!
- Glenn Greenwald: Marc Ambinder of the Atlantic enjoys the perks of being on the inside in Washington. The main perk? Never having to think for yourself again.
- The Sideshow: Is it too early to impeach Geithner?
- Perrspectives: Not only did Bush not know anything, he barely suspected anything, say Thomas Ricks.
- Arthur Silber: Mass denial probably isn’t the best economic strategy.
- Diane Tucker: Newsweek on the way out?
- The Beautiful Game: Watching U.S.-Mexico in high-definition can’t hide the fact that Mexico sucks.
- The Anti-Glenn Beck Group: Was there any money in the stimulus to shut Beck up? One can dream.
- Dan Shanoff: The United Football League is here! The United Football League is here! Meh.
- Gawker: This just in – Stephen Fowler’s a douche.
- Paul Oberjuerge: Brett Favre retires. Feel free to rerun last year’s “Brett Favre retires” stories.
- Pam’s House Blend: Texans worked hard to may sure gays and lesbians in California couldn’t get married.
–WKW
Las Vegas Mayor Oscar Goodman demands an apology, but doesn’t threaten Barack Obama with a baseball bat
February 11, 2009
When Barack Obama said this about financial company CEOs – “You can’t get corporate jets, you can’t go take a trip to Las Vegas or go down to the Super Bowl on the taxpayer’s dime.” – you knew it would only be a matter of time before Las Vegas Mayor Oscar “Let’s build a Mafia Museum” Goodman would defend his city, regardless of how ridiculous he sounds.
“That’s outrageous, and he owes us an apology. He owes us a retraction,” said Goodman.
It could have been worse for Obama, of course. Goodman could have threatened to crush his skull with a baseball bat, as he did when Bob Herbert correctly wrote “There is probably no city in America where women are treated worse than in Las Vegas.”
I don’t believe Herbert received an apology. Of course, I believe Goodman has likely made a few other death threats in his day, but that’s just my opinion. It appears, however, he’s barely smart enough not to threaten the President of the United States.
–WKW
USA vs. Mexico World Cup Qualifier notes
February 11, 2009
Some notes on the USA vs. Mexico World Cup Qualifier in Columbus, Ohio:
- Watching in Brazil, the best action early is coming from the Brazilian announcers. First trying to pronounce Clint Dempsey’s first name, which comes out as “Clinch” in Portuguese. Second, the announcer saying “Yesterday I saw Brazil and Italy, today I saw France and Argentina. Watching the U.S. and Mexico is going to be tough.”
- And watching the first 20 minutes has been tough. Really bad football being played by both teams. Really bad.
Statement from William K. Wolfrum: “I’ll take the hit on this one”
February 11, 2009
Over the course of the past several months, I have received several thousand e-mails, cards, letters, a couple fruitcakes and a telegram from loyal readers all with the same concern – Why aren’t I, William K. Wolfrum, doing anything about the global financial crisis.
Being that I am not the type to shy away from a challenge, I am here now to say that I am ready to take action. Serious action.
Now, as I understand it, the entire global financial crisis was caused by unscrupulous poor people who scammed naive bankers in complicated home loan schemes. The plan went something like this – a poor person walks into a bank looking for a loan on a home they can’t afford. The young, enthusiastic bank people would then trust the poor people and give them a loan which the poor people should be able to easily pay back. Then, the cunning poor people would stop making payments on the loan, eventually losing the house and becoming even poorer. To put this more simply, the scam went like this:
1. Poor person gets home loan
2. Poor person defaults on loan.
3. Profit!
Now, after several years and several million of these types of loan scams, the banks are mired in debt and unwilling to loan anybody anything for anything. This has left the U.S. economy in shambles. And being that the U.S. is the only nation that really matters, the rest of the world is also being punished.
These days, the Obama Administration is looking at a wide variety of solutions for this economic problem. One such solution involves the government buying all bad debts from loans and holding them all in one extremely indebted government bank. As I see it, this was more or less the same strategy employed by Enron, which means it probably is infallible.
Nonetheless, this solution does have its problems, namely in regard to the value of the dollar. Because it’s quite possible that the rest of the world – tired of not mattering – will completely lose faith in the dollar, as well as lose faith in Americans’ abilities to handle said dollars. This would cause the dollar to lose almost all of its value, sending the U.S. into a Mad Max-type reality where anarchy reigns and motorcycles are cheap and plentiful.
So now we get to my plan: Give all the bad debts to me – William K. “Bad Bank” Wolfrum. This is the sacrifice I am willing to make to keep the U.S. strong and to keep other countries from mattering. Basically, what I’m asking is that all banks everywhere clean off their books and assign all debts to me. This will free up the credit market and only slightly lower my own credit rating.
Now, I realize this will likely but me $10 trillion or so in the hole. But, trust me on this, I know about being in debt, so I don’t really see this as a big problem. Plus, I have a simple plan to get myself out of this debt. One word – coupons.
Have you ever noticed how coupons have on them that they are worth 1/100th of a cent? Well that’s because that’s the law. They have to be worth something. Thus, if you send in 100 coupons to the manufacturer, they are legally required to give you a penny.
So my plan is thus: I will collect 100,000,000,000,000,000 coupons, send them in and repay my debt.
Aside from freeing up the credit market, this plan will also create jobs. Because I will need a lot of people to help me count and collect 100,000,000,000,000,000 coupons. Payment will be made in coupons, obviously, but as you can see, coupons are the most reliable investment in times like these.
Also, aside from clearing the credit markets and creating jobs, this plan will also help rid the world of otherwise-useless coupons for peanut products created by the Peanut Corporation of America. Being that peanuts can now kill you, coupons for things like peanut butter and peanut butter crackers are now unusable. Unless you send them to me.
This is my plan, and, trust me, it’s as good a plan as is out there today. So start collecting coupons and start sending them to the Bad Bank of Bill. With your help, I can save this great nation of ours, and keep the U.S. dollar from being as valuable as a coupon.
Thank you for your time and I have retained counsel in this matter.
–WKW
John McCain finally gets something out of running for President
February 11, 2009
Received this e-mail from John “Permanent Campaign” McCain yesterday:
Being the Republican nominee for President was one of the great honors of my life and an experience I will never forget. Some have wondered, after my hard fought presidential campaign, if I plan to run for re-election to the United States Senate.
I want you to know that I do intend to seek re-election. The magnitude of the financial crisis that many American families are facing makes it clear to me that I want to continue to serve our country in the Senate.
The economic challenges currently confronting our nation are immense and unfortunately, the Democrats in Congress propose addressing these challenges through increased spending that wastes billions of taxpayers dollars and saddles our children and grandchildren with a staggering debt. Their proposals will not stimulate economic growth or create jobs. While the leader of the Democratic Party, President Obama, has pledged to change business as usual in Washington and spoken of bipartisanship, I have been saddened to watch as Congressional Democrats try to use their majority to advocate more of the same failed policies and wasteful spending of the past. With so much at stake, now is not the time to step away from my work in the Senate.
As always, I anticipate a tough re-election challenge. But with your help, we will counter those efforts and put forth an aggressive campaign by registering new voters, reaching out to Democrats, Independents and Republicans, and again earning the support of Hispanic and Native American voters in Arizona.
I am honored to serve the people of Arizona as their United States Senator. I would be most appreciative of your support of my re-election efforts and hope you will click here to join my re-election team. Thank you for your consideration.
Sincerely,
John McCain
PS: I hope you will join “Friends of McCain” today by logging on to www.FriendsofMcCain.com and donating $25, $50, $100, $250, $500 or more to my re-election campaign.
Thank goodness, and here I was worried that I – a Californian residing in Brazil – wouldn’t be able to take part in Arizona’s election process.
–WKW
The Taliban gives Pete Sessions more lessons
February 11, 2009
More Talban tactics for Pete Sessions and the GOP to learn from:
KABUL, Afghanistan (CNN) — Taliban militants carried out a series of coordinated attacks on government buildings in Afghanistan Wednesday, killing at least 23 people and wounding 69 others.
The militants attacked the ministries of justice, education and finance in Kabul and a prison near the Khair Khana district, north of Kabul, the NATO-led security alliance in the country said.
The Taliban claimed responsibility, saying the attacks were in retaliation for mistreatment of prisoners in Afghan jails, the interior ministry said.
In the aftermath of the attack, the casualty count varied wildly from hour to hour. Afghan officials have scheduled a news conference later Wednesday where they are expected to release more details about the attacks.
“This attack shows the real face of the Taliban,” said Gen. David D. McKiernan, with the NATO-led International Security Assistance Force. “This is another example of the Taliban impeding progress for Afghans.”
These are just not people to negotiate with.
–WKW
You don’t know a damned thing about the financial crisis
February 10, 2009
If there’s one thing I can say with almost absolute certainty, it’s that – unless you’ve educated yourself on it independently – you don’t know a damned thing about the financial crisis, TARP, the Stimulus plan, or anything going on with the U.S. and the world economy.
And that’s because the mainstream media won’t let you know. The two largest television news organization have made it perfectly clear that they have no interest in reporting any of it or giving anyone information that’s in the slightest bit valuable. Instead, they endlessly trot out hyper-partisans from each side to tell you how ideologues should think during these troubled economic times.
Take CNN, which finds it newsworthy to give GOP blowhard Alex Castellanos time to state his radical dogma of ignorance:
“[Obama's] caught between the rock and the hard place on this one. He’s got Democrats who want him to spend more on the left and Republicans who say, hey, this is crazy.
And I know Krugman won the Nobel Prize, but so did Al Gore. It can’t be that hard. (laughter.)
And if economists were that good, they’d all be rich and they’re not. So let’s take all this with a grain of salt here.
I mean, what the Democrats are telling the country now is, they’re having a debate, ‘We’re gonna take a big pile of money and set it on fire. We’re going to borrow it, make a big pile and set in on fire.’ And the argument is that the pile of money is not big enough. So while the Democrats are having this internal debate, the message they’re sending is: Big Spending.”
Krugman is about the only economist to be given any substantial air time in discussions of the economy and stimulus package, due to the star quality he brings from the New York Times and his Nobel Prize. And while I have a lot of respect for Krugman, I’m very aware he brings his own biases to the topic. Whether I agree with him or not is moot.
Haven’t we heard from enough politicians and rabid partisans on these issues? Haven’t we heard Barack Obama fear-monger enough? Haven’t we heard Lindsay Graham and other GOPers enough? I can give you everything the opinions of both sides of the issues quite easily:
Left: We need this stimulus package now, to create jobs and stem the tide of this recession that Republicans caused.
Right: Tax cuts. Democrat wastefully spend your money and want a socialist regime. Tax cuts.
That’s it. That’s all any partisan will say on the issue, regardless of how many words they use. And because of that, you don’t know a damned thing about the economy other than it’s bad. Hell, that’s pretty much all I know.
I’m no economist. But I’d sure like it if American citizens got to hear from a wide variety of economists from across the globe and across the political spectrum. Because then maybe we’d have a better idea on a crisis that’s clearly not a black-and-white issue.
But that will never happen. So stay tuned for more politicians and partisans to tell you nonsensical political slogans that have no real meaning, no real use, and no inkling of economic reason.
–WKW
Welcome to South Carolina – where you’ll either get murdered or arrested for partying
February 10, 2009
South Carolina may be one of the most violent states in the nation, but victimless crimes involving Michael Phelps will not go unpunished:
A television station in Columbia, S.C., is reporting that local law enforcement officials have made eight arrests in connection with a house party where Olympian Michael Phelps’ photo may have been taken with a marijuana bong in his hands. Seven of the arrests were for drug possession and the eighth was for drug distribution, according to the WIS-TV (Channel 10) report.
WIS reporter Jack Kuenzie also reported that the bong’s owner had offered the device for sale on EBay for as much as $100,000. Kuenzie said that the Sheriff’s Department now has the device.
For the record, in 2007, South Carolina had the second-highest crime index number in the U.S. S.C. was No. 2 in violent crimes, No. 6 in murder and No. 11 in rape.
So come Discover South Carolina. Sure, you’ll likely either be the victim of a violent crime, or arrested for attending a house party, but, hey, I hear the beaches are wonderful.
–WKW
Brazil 2, Italy 0 – Game notes
February 10, 2009
Notes on Brazil’s 2-0 victory over Italy in a friendly in London:
- A beautiful goal by Fabio Grosso is taken away by a bad offside call from a linesman 50 yards away from the play.
- Brazil’s two first-half goals illustrated just how talented troubled Robinho is on the pitch. First setting up Manchester City teammate Elano, then making Pirlo, Zambrotta and Buffon spectators with a first-class steal, move and shot that were simply breathtaking.
- Elano is a player who almost always shines for the Brazilians but has committed the cardinal sin of playing the same position as Kaka.
Vital U.S. Census News: If you can’t get boxing analogies correct, don’t make them
February 10, 2009
The Obama Administration’s decisions to nominate Republican Judd Gregg as Secretary of Commerce and then to have the Census Bureau report to the White House are curious, indeed. Fox News and the GOP are apoplectic about the move of Census oversight, which is understandable. At this point, I just don’t have the info needed to make a logical guess at what it all means, aside from it giving off an early stench of Chicago politics. Some non-partisan info is needed, but at this stage that’s hard to come by.
I will say this, however. If someone is going to rail against the change and then make a boxing reference, as Peter Roff did, then at least make the boxing reference correct. Here was what Roff wrote:
An honest count, as heavyweight boxer Gene Tunney would never forget, is just too important to mess with.
Right or wrong, in historical reference, Gene Tunney benefited from the long count (or it would just be remembered as “the count.”) Roff’s analogy only works if he had used Jack Dempsey as the boxer in question.
–WKW
No one expects a blogaround IX
February 10, 2009
The first rule of Israel’s nuclear arsenal is that you don’t talk about Israel’s nuclear arsenal. The second rule is that you’re an anti-Semite for even reading this.
- Whiskey Fire: Steve Forbes is an idiot and Michael Steele doesn’t have an actual job.
- Lance Mannion: Just think whatever Chuck Todd tells you to think, ok?
- William K. Wolfrum: At WorldGolf.com, I make a reservation for Tiger and Elin’s new foursome.
- Sadly, No!: And now, some Conservatives are proud to be treasonous blarts.
- No More Mister Nice Blog: Hmmmm, kinda chilly outside. I better wear a jacket and GLOBAL WARMING IS A MYTH!!!
- Paul Krugman: 500,000 less jobs = Bipartisan compromise!
- News Hounds: When the going gets tough for Bill O’Reilly, Bill O’Reilly attacks Helen Thomas.
- Michael Calderone: Ann Coulter, fraudulent voter?
- Ace of Spades: Wars never end. They are one or lost. See “Wars, Star” for examples.
- Talking Points Memo: A day without a robocall is like a day without spam in your e-mail box.
- Brad DeLong: Seven out of seven economists agree – Do something!
–WKW
The U.S. ready to Liberally bomb the world into submission
February 9, 2009
If there is one thing we learned from the Bush Administration, it’s that America’s massive military edge over the rest of the planet does not automatically equal international respect. Because while The U.S. has successfully bombed hundreds of thousands to their death over the past eight years, the world in general has not risen up and cheered wildly as one would hope.
Which is why the election of Barack Obama was such an important move for the United States. Beloved internationally, Obama brings impressive liberal credentials to the White House. More than that, he’s brought a progressive foreign policy team into the fold, as well. For the international community, this couldn’t be better news. Because now that the Neo-conservative scourge has been swept aside, the United States can now adopt a more progressive style of diplomacy, and begin the process of liberally bombing other nations into submission.
Felipão out in Chelsea – will Scolari take the reins on Brazilian National team?
February 9, 2009
The great Luiz Felipe Scolari experiment has come to an end at Chelsea, as the Blues have dumped Felipão as coach after seven unsuccessful months.
“The Chelsea board would like to place on record our gratitude for his time as manager,” said Chelsea in a statement. “Felipe has brought many positives to the club since he joined and we all feel a sense of sadness that our relationship has ended so soon. Unfortunately, the results and performances of the team appeared to be deteriorating at a key time in the season.”
Despite a strong start and reputation, injuries and the inability to bring in a big-name signing helped doom Scolari, and a recent run of bad form at Stamford Bridge has left Chelsea seven points off of Manchester United in the English Premiere League and now has left Scolari unemployed.
It likely won’t be that way for long. Dunga, the coach of the Brazilian National Team, has become one of the most despised figures in all of Brazil, with his defensive-first style of coaching and a run of unspirited efforts by his squad of dazzlers.
Having guided Brazil to its last World Cup title in 2002, fans and media in Brazil long to get Felipão back into the fold, sure that his more offensive-minded philosophy will be just the tonic to get the Seleção back to the top.
In the end, Scolari’s dismissal at Chelsea likely means bad news for Dunga more than he. Expect to see Scolari handed the reins of the Brazilian National team soon.
–WKW
We don’t need no stinkin’ plan – The Taliban GOP strikes back
February 9, 2009
The Republicans are back! This rag-tag group of elite have learned the lessons of such political forces as the Taliban and have remade their brand. No more are they a corrupt group of Bush Yes Men. They see the light at the end of the tunnel, and while that tunnel doesn’t have one logical idea hidden in it, it sure has a lot of principle, ideology and no votes. Now that’s belief we can’t change in.
From the Washington Post:
Three months after their Election Day drubbing, Republican leaders see glimmers of rebirth in the party’s liberation from an unpopular president, its selection of its first African American chairman and, most of all, its stand against a stimulus package that they are increasingly confident will provide little economic jolt but will pay off politically for those who oppose it.
After giving the package zero votes in the House, and 0with their counterparts in the Senate likely to provide in a crucial procedural vote today only the handful of votes needed to avoid a filibuster, Republicans are relishing the opportunity to make a big statement. Rep. Pete Sessions (R-Tex.) suggested last week that the party is learning from the disruptive tactics of the Taliban, and the GOP these days does have the bravado of an insurgent band that has pulled together after a big defeat to carry off a quick, if not particularly damaging, raid on the powers that be.
“We’re so far ahead of where we thought we’d be at this time,” said Rep. Paul D. Ryan (R-Wis.), one of several younger congressmen seeking to lead the party’s renewal. “It’s not a sign that we’re back to where we need to be, but it’s a sign that we’re beginning to find our voice. We’re standing on our core principles, and the core principle that suffered the most in recent years was fiscal conservatism and economic liberty. That was the tallest pole in our tent, and we took an ax to it, but now we’re building it back.”
Basically, it comes down to this – as jobs are being shed at a historic pace, the Republicans are pitching a tent. Country First, baby, Country First.
–WKW
