William K. Wolfrum’s Morning – Dance, Tucker! Dance!
August 31, 2010 by William K. Wolfrum
Tucker Carlson’s greatest journalistic achievement.
La Barbie Caught: One of Mexico’s most notorious drug lords has been caught! Also, applications now being accepted for Notorious Mexican Drug Lord. Apply at the FBI.
Hurricane Earl: It’s coming. And it looks pissed.
Scotland Takes the Lead: Now that Scotland has come up with a wind turbine that can supply energy to 1,000 homes, maybe someone else will step up.
Afghanistan Update: Death!
An Independent Iraq: Iraq has announced it is now independent. This means all hell should break loose any minute.
ObamaCare Already Paying Off: Paying off or scammers, at least. It was nice of the media to help everyone get informed on the subject, eh?
Investigating America: Remember when Republicans spent two solid years wasting time and money on investigating every last move Clinton made? And then the U.S. was attacked by al Qaeda and they blame Clinton for being investigated so much? Yeah, we’re going to try that again.
Being as the rest of the U.S. mainstream media refuses to call out Fox News for their false reporting and demagoguery, from here on out, I say we just lump them all in together. Example: Led by Glenn Beck, the Mainstream Media recently held a big rally about Jesus.
Dance, I Say!: The new stars for Dancing with the Stars have been announced. They include: Bristol Palin, Grover from Sesame Street, Mandrake the Magician, Jean Harlow, Erik Estrada, Emo Phillips, Lindsay Lohan and veteran porn star Christy Canyon. Oh, ok, for the real stars click here.
Paris Chews GREAT Gum: Paris Hilton was busted for cocaine possession. Her excuse – she thought it was gum. Cocaine-gum, just another thing that makes the rich better than you.
In a perfect world, Sarah Palin would be Queen and surrounded by a bunch of gun-toting Jesus Babies.