I have fallen in love – with my Twitter persona
January 4, 2013 by William K. Wolfrum
A few years ago, I decided to join the social network website Twitter. In the time since, I have gathered more than 11,000 followers and earned much praise for my witticisms and moral fiber. Also, I’ve fallen in love.
It wasn’t supposed to be like this. But I have found someone who I dream of being like and who I want to spend all my time with – my Twitter persona.
My Twitter persona – @Wolfrum – is the type of human I always wished I could be. It is pragmatic and thoughtful. It is fair and open-minded. It is funny but rarely hurtful. It rarely shows anger or pettiness. It’s even better looking than I am. My Twitter persona is my dream human.
I suppose I started getting feelings toward my Twitter persona at about the time I started to detach my actual life from my online life. Because, let’s face it, my online life is going much better. As time has progressed I have had a multitude of emotions toward my Twitter persona, including jealousy and schadenfreude.
Eventually, though, I was unable to relate to my Twitter persona as myself. It`s just so much better than me in every way. So, I started sexting with it and sending it pics. As time has gone on, my feelings for my Twitter persona have grown to full-fledged love.
My friends, I make this admission as a warning to all of you. Don’t allow your Twitter persona to control your life. And don’t allow it to become an entity unto itself. Because right now, my Twitter persona is a much, much better person than I am. But I love it for it.