Unemployed guy who doesn’t care about his social media reputation says anything he wants

December 20, 2013 by  

God celebrates the DNC folding over a non-issue.

DES MOINES — “Gay people are made of orange peels and frog legs,” shouted William K. Wolfrum.

“Black people poop pumpkin pie!” Wolfrum added.

Wolfrum, who is unemployed, said he was practicing his First Amendment rights to say anything he likes.

“Mexicans have four nipples,” bleated Wolfrum.

Wolfrum, who said he doesn’t care about his social media reputation, said he felt free to say whatever he wished because the government would not charge him with a crime or detain him in anyway.

“I’m free,” said Wolfrum, 46. “Icelanders drink squirrel milk!!”

Wolfrum, however, admits that he understands his radical viewpoints mean that he will struggle to find future employment.

“Oh, yeah, I’m screwed,” said Wolfrum. “Maybe I can see if Obama will step in and force someone to hire me. If not, I don’t see anyone hiring me. Or even talking to me much.”

Wolfrum, however, said what really mattered was his freedom to say important things that truly mattered and drove social change.

“All Irish people have butterscotch in their hair,” blathered Wolfrum.

–WKW

Comments

2 Responses to “Unemployed guy who doesn’t care about his social media reputation says anything he wants”

  1. Blue Gal on December 24th, 2013 11:28 am

    post of the week! xoxo

  2. nancy flanagan on January 22nd, 2014 11:47 am

    I am a marginally employed irish person who gives a shit about whoever
    thinks whatever
    sort of
    Nice to meet you

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