Archive for the 'One-Liners' Category

Glenn Beck has a huge pain in his ass

Thursday, January 10th, 2008

Now he finally knows how the rest of us feel, knowing he has his own show to unleash his demented, fringe rantings.

–WKW

Random thought: Hell freezing over and over

Monday, December 3rd, 2007

So the remaining members of Led Zeppelin are getting back together to rake it in. The Eagles really paved the way on this one and are coming back for seconds it seems. At some point there comes a time in your life that you just figure “For the money they’re paying me, I can take being around these pricks for a few months.”

–WKW

One-Liner: Crowed

Monday, April 23rd, 2007

At least we can all agree on this: Anyone who gets angry when touched by Sheryl Crow is evil to the depths of their soul.

crowed

–WKW

One-Liner: Transparency

Thursday, March 22nd, 2007

Governments will fight to avoid having to be transparent to citizens.

transparency

–WKW

Random attack on Catholicism IV

Wednesday, February 28th, 2007

Editor’s Note: Having recently noticed that Bill Donohue, the head of the Catholic League, was spending a great deal of time and energy fighting off imaginary Hollywood sodomites, we here at Williamkwolfrum.com decided to send out a more focused message to get Donohue back on track.

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Catholics would rather declare bankruptcy than make amends to children that Catholic priests raped.

Catholic greed

–WKW

One-Liner: A sick China

Wednesday, February 28th, 2007

When China gets a cold, the United States is the first to sneeze.

China gets a cold

–WKW

One-Liner: Turducken

Wednesday, February 14th, 2007

Turducken is just plain funny. Even more so when covered with bacon.

Turducken is funny

–WKW

One-Liner: Whipped

Thursday, February 8th, 2007

Life’s far too short to not get whipped cream.

whip me

–WKW

One-Liner: Madden

Wednesday, January 31st, 2007

It’s a pity that there’s no God, because if there were, I’d ask it to bless John Madden and the folks at EA Sports.

Madden-ing

–WKW

One-Liner: Relax

Tuesday, January 30th, 2007

I keep getting spam e-mails trying to sell me something that will increase the volume of my ejaculation by 500 percent, which seems slightly horrifying, if you ask me.

geyser

–WKW