But Michael Phelps smoked pot

February 3, 2009 by  

Brazilian soccer superstar Robinho was arrested for sexual assault last week.

But Michael Phelps smoked pot.

Syracuse University starting guard Eric Devendorf allegedly hit a female student in the face, but faced no charges and is again playing.

But Michael Phelps smoked pot.

Former Central Michigan University football player Darren Paul Martin was arrested for unlawful imprisonment, assault with intent to commit sexual penetration, attempted sexual conduct in the third degree, and a variety of other offenses.

But Michael Phelps smoked pot.

Two University of Arkansas-Monticello football players were arrested for a home invasion and “inappropriately touched” a woman in the house they robbed.

But Michael Phelps smoked pot.

Former NFL player David Meggett was arrested and charged with raping a 21-year-old woman in her North Charleston, S.C., home, authorities said. Meggett had been out on bond in connection with another sexual assault charge.

But Michael Phelps smoked pot.

Kobe Bryant scored 61 points in New York the other night, leaving Knicks fans cheering and prompting Ted Green to write a flowery article about him in the Los Angeles Times that included this passage:

His one big mistake in Colorado, followed by the ugly divorce from Shaq, made it easy for the haters, gave them plenty of ammunition, and they happily loaded up, some still firing to this day.

But today, it all seems so old, so 2004, so tired, past-tense and out of touch. So childish.

In the same paper, you’ll find this: “Michael Phelps could face criminal charges in South Carolina.”

Because he smoked pot.



6 Responses to “But Michael Phelps smoked pot”

  1. William K. Wolfrum Chronicles » Blog Archive » Dear Michael Phelps, Don’t sweat it. Love, Kobe on February 6th, 2009 4:44 am

    [...] Dear Michael Phelps, [...]

  2. William K. Wolfrum Chronicles » Blog Archive » Brazil 2, Italy 0 - Game notes on February 10th, 2009 1:56 pm

    [...] - Brazil’s two first-half goals illustrated just how talented troubled Robinho is on the pitch. First setting up Manchester City teammate Elano, then making Pirlo, Zambrotta and Buffon spectators with a first-class steal, move and shot that were simply breathtaking. [...]

  3. William K. Wolfrum Chronicles » Blog Archive » With three months off, Michael Phelps can search for the ultimate Golden Ticket on February 13th, 2009 4:12 am

    [...] Michael Phelps, the American swimmer who let down all of humanity by being photographed with a bong, was suspended from swimming for three months by the American Continental Association of People Who Swim Fast Competitively (or whatever). As it turns out, this was the best thing that could happen to him. Now he has time to search for the “Golden Ticket,” to be given away by producers of the movie “The Wackness.” WIN A TRIP TO AMSTERDAM AND A BAG OF MARIJUANA! [...]

  4. William K. Wolfrum Chronicles » Blog Archive » Michael Phelps caught drinking with girls in Las Vegas - behead him now on February 16th, 2009 5:08 am

    [...] Disgraced swimming legend Michael Phelps has been caught in yet another disgraceful pose, this time enjoying a cocktail with a group of women at a Las Vegas party. [...]

  5. William K. Wolfrum Chronicles » Blog Archive » Michael Phelps smokes pot - fights world hunger on March 12th, 2009 4:49 am

    [...] After dismissing Michael Phelps as a spokesman for the crime of acting like a 23-year-old, Kellogs made an amazing discovery - the cereal boxes with Phelps on the front are filled with food. Food people in need could eat. (CNN) — When Kellogg’s dumped its endorsement of Michael Phelps after a photograph surfaced of the Olympic gold medalist using a bong, the company was stuck with thousands of boxes of cereal featuring the swimmer’s image. [...]

  6. William K. Wolfrum Chronicles » Blog Archive » Breaking: Michael Phelps photographed throwing a football!! on April 12th, 2009 7:01 am

    [...] The photo says it all. The nation awaits Michael Phelps’ tearful apology for this youthful dalliance with the evil pigskin. [...]

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