Sharia Law for everyone!

September 20, 2010 by  

It’s time for Sharia Law to come to the United States. This nation has settled into a moral and economic funk that only a healthy dose of Sharia Law can fix.

Oh sure, you’ve probably heard lots of bad things about Sharia Law. You probably think that it’s an Islamic plot to overthrow the world and control humanity. But this information – provided to you by the likes of Newt Gingrich – is based on ignorance and bigotry.

Here are just a few examples of how Sharia Law will make things better for everyone:

  • Getting stoned will finally be legalized.
  • Free Cake on Wednesdays.
  • Ramadan will cure national obesity epidemic, and work off all that cake.
  • A whole new “Veil Industry” will provide good jobs for Americans.
  • Automatic weapons will be available at gas stations.
  • People who can’t dance will no longer feel ashamed.
  • And much, much more!

So, am I suggesting that the U.S. be ruled by Sharia Law? Hell yes I am! Trust me on this, it would be a non-stop cake party. And America would regain its place as the greatest nation in the history of nations.

Of course, there’s no chance in hell Sharia Law will become the law of the land in the U.S. But if you’re going to be ignorant about something that will never happen, why not pretend it’s a great thing rather than be terrified of it?



3 Responses to “Sharia Law for everyone!”

  1. dgun on September 20th, 2010 5:26 pm

    And I wouldn’t need an excuse for not shaving.

    “Why didn’t you shave?”

    “Cuz I’m a Sharia law abiding citizen?”

  2. William K. Wolfrum on September 20th, 2010 5:53 pm
  3. Tamra on September 22nd, 2010 5:01 pm

    ROFLMAO guns at gas stations, you say?? you mean, I’d NEVER HAVE TO PAY FOR GAS AGAIN??? cool. hehe

    um not advocating robbery, but damn if u give me a gun after charging me $4.00 a gallon and there’s a Slurpee machine nearby too, some shit’s about to go down. just saying!!!

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