12 GOP senators switch to communism after Obama buys them dinner

March 7, 2013 by  

WASHINGTON - President Barack Obama - in an attempt to ease tensions with Senate Republicans - bought a dozen GOP senators dinner last night, in what all have said was a pleasant evening. The dinner was held at the Jefferson Hotel, with Obama picking up the tab out of his own pocket.

The 12 senators - John McCain, Tom Coburn, Bob Corker, Kelly Ayotte, Dan Coats, Richard Burr, Mike Johanns, Pat Toomey, Ron Johnson, John Hoeven, Lindsey Graham and Saxby Chambliss - were all so moved by the President’s largess, that all switched their party affiliation to communist immediately following the dinner.

“If this is communism, it’s delicious!” said Johnson, who dined on shrimp risotto. “The people United cannot be divided! And neither will a check when Barack is around.”

Following the dinner, all 12 senators said they would back any plan the President had on any issue, and will work to convince their GOP colleagues that “communism is where it’s at,” as McCain said.

“The President today showed his true stripes - striped bass that is!” said Coburn, wearing a Che Guevarra T-shirt. “Seriously though, President Obama is a great man and I’ll do anything for him now. Anything. Name it.”

While some of the 12 senators stated they wished now Obama would be more liberal and buy them dessert, the dinner was a major victory for the President. The dinner was also a victory for American political pundits, who have long stated that if Obama was only nicer to Republicans, then everything would be cool.

-WKW


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