Mitt Romney is just not very good at this

If there’s one thing that’s glaringly apparent in the GOP nomination process, it’s this – Mitt Romney is just not a very good candidate for office.

It shouldn’t be this way. Romney is very intelligent, attractive to the point it almost appears he was assembled by a crack team of human designers, and well spoken. Add to that the fact that he can afford the best campaign advisors money can by, and he truly should be a juggernaut of a candidate.

But here’s Romney’s flaw in a nutshell – he is unwilling and unable to own up to who he is and what he has done.

He is unable to own up to his record as the Governor of Massachusetts. This really shouldn’t be that hard. He was a Republican who became governor of a very liberal state. In a country where state’s rights have become all the rage, why can’t he own up to the fact that he governed it as conservatively as he could, but still had constituents to please?

He is unable to own up to his own wealth and privilege. For God’s sakes, he intimated that he’s middle class. He tried to say he spent time in Paris as a street urchin (he actually lived in a mansion). He tries to make his time at Bain Capital appear as though it was philanthropic, that it was all about job creation. Here he is, the leading candidate for the Republican party, and he’s practically apologizing for being rich and successful.

Romney comes off as completely out-of-touch for two reasons – 1) He is. 2) He pretends he isn’t. Say what you will about guys like Rick Santorum and Newt Gingrich, but at least they know who they are and why they do what they do.

Mitt Romney, for all he has going for him, is uncomfortable being Mitt Romney. He is unable to take command of who he is and what he has done. This is why he is a lousy candidate. This is why he’ll never be President of the United States.

–WKW

John Huntsmann made a name for himself in the GOP

Today, the brave and serious campaign of John Huntsmann will end. And we are all the lesser for it.

In what has been a contentious race for the GOP nomination for President, Hantsman brought class, strength and vision to an otherwise unworthy field. Sure, Hurtmink never seemed to get past 5 percent in most polling and found himself being beaten by the non-running Stephen Colbert in a recent South Carolina poll, but those are just numbers.

You see, Hankmen brought a quiet, unassuming charm to a boisterous crowd of candidates. While Newt Gingrich and Rick Perry threw red meat to their followers, Hartmap was a calm, almost unnoticeable visage through debate after debate after debate.

His attempts at humor were genius, often going over the head of everyone in the nation. Who can forget his Kurt Cobain joke? Or his joke in Mandarin? Most people, probably. But that never deterred Hampton. He went forward with a quiet dignity, and truly earned his spot as “The Guy Who Polled Slightly Higher Than Buddy Roemer.”

The race for the Republican nomination has been marked by vitriol and confusion. But one man stood above it all. And he is no longer in the race, one thing is incredibly clear – by running for President, John Harbaugh truly made a name for himself.

–WKW

Mitt Romney at the RNC Convention: What to say, what to say?

As the results start flowing in from the New Hampshire primary, it’s time to accept an absolute – Mitt Romney will win the GOP nomination and be the man on the ballot against Barack Obama. It all comes down to one simple fact: The average Republican voter is not a mindless ideologue in search of moral victories. They want a candidate that at least has a shot, and Romney is that guy.

The rest of the Republican race for the nomination will be more or less kabuki. A candidate will go up, a candidate will go down. Newt Gingrich will say something stupid. Rick Santorum will hate on gays and lesbians. Rick Perry will drop out tomorrow. basically, the only thing of interest now – regardless what the media tells you – is how badly Romney’s fellow candidates will hamstring him leading up to his match-up against Obama. It’s very possible – likely even – that candidates will soon fall in line and hail young Willard as the man of the hour. However, it’s also possible they will tear into Romney with everything they and their Super PACS have and leave him a shuddering shell in the general election. At very least, it makes the whole endeavor watchable.

But here’s where it will get interesting. At the RNC Convention in August, they will need to say SOMETHING about Romney. In 2008, John McCain was helped at the RNC Convention. No matter what your feelings about the guy, his military experiences and government service made for great theater. For Romney, Republicans can only talk about his time as governor of Massachusetts for so long before they run into that pesky Romneycare issue. And now, with the help of Gingrich, Romney’s time at Bain Capital has become untouchable.

Essentially, when Mitt Romney walks up to the stage to accept the GOP nomination, he will do so after being lauded as a guy who ran a long-forgotten Olympics and a guy who ran for officie and failed a lot. There really isn’t much more to say.

–WKW

Fun with Some E-Cards

Thanks to SomeEcards.

–WKW

Libertarianism: The Blue pill

Libertarianism is the belief that life is a simulation and that human nature is not one of the variables.

–WKW

Hateful words at William K. Wolfrum Chronicles? Stop blaming William K. Wolfrum

Every few years, a group of mindless political operatives shriek loudly about how I, William K. Wolfrum, am a racist. This, my friends, is an exercise in futility, as I am obviously not a racist. Nonetheless, these hateful smear mongers continue to pursue these charges.

These charges are baseless, and come from words that appeared at “William K. Wolfrum Chronicles” years ago, such as:

“Opinion polls consistently show only about 5% of blacks have sensible political opinions.”

“If you have ever been robbed by a black teen-aged male, you know how unbelievably fleet-footed they can be.”

Also:

“Racial Violence Will Fill Our Cities” because “mostly black welfare recipients will feel justified in stealing from mostly white ‘haves.’”

“I’ve urged everyone in my family to know how to use a gun in self defense. For the animals are coming.”

“Jury verdicts, basketball games, and even music are enough to set off black rage, it seems.”

Other lying, slander-demons have pointed out that William K. Wolfrum Chronicles often supports right-wing militia thinking and anti-Semetic beliefs. They point to anti-civil rights words that appeared here, such as:

(Boy, it sure burns me to have a national holiday for that pro-Communist philanderer, Martin Luther King. I voted against this outrage time and time again as a Congressmen [sic]. What an infamy that Ronald Reagan Approved it! We can thank him for our annual Hate Whitey Day.)

Listen to a black radio talk show in any major city. The Racial Hatred makes a KKK rally look tame. The blacks talk about their own racial superiority, how the whites have a conspiracy to wipe them out, and how they are going to take over the country and enact retribution.

Or they bring up homophobic words that appeared here, such as:

AIDS sufferers “enjoy the attention and pity that comes with being sick.”

“Homosexuals, not to speak of the rest of society, were far better off when social pressure forced them to hide their activities.”

There is a simple reason why these words appeared at William K. Wolfrum Chronicles: They weren’t written by me. They were written by someone else. I have no idea who. But man, that person is a jerk.

So there you have it. I have detailed the charges against me and shown them all to be false. Like the great Dr. Ron Paul before me, I am being judged for something that has nothing to do with me. I will fight these attacks with ferocity by continually telling people one thing – It wasn’t me.

My friends, William K. Wolfrum Chronicles – written, edited and bankrolled by me, William K. Wolfrum – is not a racist, homophobic or anti-semetic Web site and contains no such views, except the above examples and probably some other ones. But they have nothing to do with me. Case closed. So let’s drop this subject and talk about how the Gold Standard will save us all.

–WKW

When Fascism Comes to America

Feel free to add your own.

–WKW

The GOP Race for the Presidency: The greatest Book-Selling Scam ever

The race to the GOP nomination has very little to do with actually winning the Presidency, and much more to do with selling books. Just about every GOP contender has a new book, or books out, as well as other Republicans connected with the GOP race.

A quick rundown:

Newt Gingrich: “The Crater” & “A Nation Like No Other”

Callista Gingrich: “Sweet Land of Liberty”

Mitt Romney: “No Apology: The Case for American Greatness”

Rick Perry: “Fed Up”

Herman Cain: “This Is Herman Cain! My Journey To The White House”

Donald Trump: “Time to Get Tough”

Ron Paul: “Ron Paul Family Cookbook”

Michele Bachmann: “Core of Conviction”

President Barack Obama had success weaving his books – including “Dreams of My Father” and “The Audacity of Hope” – into his 2008 run for President. But the Republicans have taken it one step further, with all of them incorporating book signings into their campaigns.

Basically, the GOP field and assorted hangers ons and spouses, have used the Republican Presidential race  as a way to sell books and line their pockets. George Will - “Mr. Cain, who used this as a book tour, in a fundamentally disrespectful approach to the selection of presidents.” – hit the nail on the head regarding Cain. But the fact is, all the candidates are doing it.

This isn’t a political campaign any longer for the GOP. It’s a book-selling scam.

–WKW

Update: Brazil keeping Chevron’s feet to the fire over oil spill

Last week I wrote about the Chevron oil spill in the Frade Oil Field off the coast of Rio de Janeiro in Brazil, as well as how Brazil has held Chevron’s feet to the fire for the incident. Brazil is continuing to keep the pressure on Chevron. A couple updates:

Brazil says Chevron must come in line with Brazilian law as they claim Chevron has lied and hidden details of the spill:

Chevron, the second-largest U.S. oil producer after Exxon Mobil Corp., needs to comply with the country’s laws and coordinate activities with the country’s oil regulator, Minister Edison Lobao said in an interview in Brasilia today.

Brazil plans to offer exploration areas by the end of 2012 in the so-called pre-salt region in deep waters of the Atlantic Ocean. Brazil has made the largest oil discoveries in the Americas in more than three decades in the area, where oil deposits of up to four miles below the ocean floor are trapped under a layer of salt.

Chevron “needs to completely come into line with Brazilian law,” Lobao said. “From time to time there are gaps of information between them and the agency.”

Chevron has come under increased scrutiny in Brazil after it leaked 2,400 barrels of oil last month from an oil field in deep waters of the Campos Basin. Chevron underestimated the amount of pressure at an oil deposit it was exploring, and crude leaked from the reservoir for about eight days, George Buck, the head of Chevron for Brazil, said on Nov. 20. …

Brazil’s oil regulator, known as ANP, is investigating Chevron for only providing partial video clips of the Nov. 7 oil spill and not reporting the presence of hydrogen sulfide in an oil well at the Frade project where the spill happened, Magda Chambriard, a director at the agency, said Dec. 1.

The agency ordered Chevron to shut the well with hydrogen sulfide and is also investigating inconsistencies in Chevron’s plan to cement and abandon the well that caused the leak, she said. The agency has prohibited Chevron from drilling any new wells for at least three months until it finishes probing the spill, Chambriard said.

Chevron to be kicked out of Brazil if they do not comply:

BRASILIA – U.S.-based Chevron Corp. will have to leave Brazil if it fails to comply with the agreement it reached to deal with the damage caused by an oil spill last month off the coast of Rio de Janeiro state, Energy and Mines Minister Edison Lobao said.

“The company has already been given a very strong penalty for what it did and it has been suspended from engaging in new drilling in Brazil, even if it is the second-largest oil company in the world,” Lobao told reporters in Teresina, the capital of the northeastern state of Piaui.

Chevron must pay a fine of 50 million reais (about $28 million) levied by officials and took responsibility for the environmental damage caused by the spill, whose extent has still not been determined, the energy minister said.

Brazil holding its ground against the Oil Companies:

Speaking to the Financial Times, Carlos Minc, Rio’s environment secretary and the country’s former environment minister, says he is now pushing for tougher rules for companies looking to profit from Brazil’s oil boom.

“We may be a tropical country but we’re not a ‘banana republic’,” he says. “Everyone wants to come to Brazil and if we’re not strict with [Chevron], this place is going to turn into a pool of oil.” …

“If we let Chevron make an error, there will be a thousand more errors during pre-salt,” says Mr Minc. “We need to be hard now, especially on big companies such as Chevron, which has all the resources to do things the right way, but got it wrong,”

Last week ANP, Brazil’s oil and gas regulator, put further pressure on the company by shutting down another well at its Frade project after a safety audit found unreported hydrogen sulphide. The week before, ANP already said it would ban Chevron, which ranks as the country’s third-largest oil producer, from drilling wells in the country’s waters until the causes of the incident had been further clarified.

Ibama, Brazil’s environmental regulator, imposed the maximum fine it could on Chevron of R$50m ($28m), and Mr Minc says the company can expect at least another R$200m in fines from regulators and the state government.

Meanwhile, the federal police have launched their own investigation, which could even lead to the imprisonment of Chevron workers for environmental crimes. …

Mr Minc has also pushed regulators to ban Transocean, Chevron’s drilling partner on the project, which also operated the drill in the Gulf of Mexico spill. Transocean responded by saying it would fully co-operate with the authorities.

However, Mr Minc warns the industry of even stricter regulations, calling for the maximum fines to be doubled.

The difference between how the U.S. government coddled and protected BP for the much-larger Gulf of Mexico oil disaster and how Brazil is handling this incident could not be more striking.

–WKW

 

 

Newt Gingrich and Tim Tebow: Winning ugly

As of this very moment, there are two men that are dominating the news – and both of them are just awful at their chosen professions. But amazingly enough, we are all witnessing mediocrity rise to incredible heights as a lousy NFL quarterback is leading his team to victories while a lousy politician is leading the race for the GOP nomination for President.

Yes, my friends, with Newt Gingrich and Tim Tebow, America is putting its worst foot forward and getting a chance to enjoy the fruits of lousiness. And while the two are incredibly different in many ways, there are some striking similarities to their current runs of success.

Unexamined, both Tebow and Gingrich look like winners. Tebow has led the Denver Broncos to six victories in seven games, often pulling off miracle comebacks to get the job done. Gingrich has managed to become the consensus front-runner of the race to the GOP nomination, despite having his campaign all but die at birth.

There is one simple reason for the duo’s success, however – an incredible lack of competition. Tebow’s six victories have come against teams with a combined 29-42 record, with none of them resembling a playoff team.

For Gingrich, his race to the top of the GOP comes against an even worse field. Keep in mind, Herman Cain was the GOP front-runner only a scant few weeks ago. Donald Trump has spent time on top of the polls. For the most part, Gingrich has ascended to the top for one main reason – his name isn’t Mitt Romney.

Thus, the current successes of Gingrich and Tebow have mostly come in spite of themselves. Gingrich is no doubt an experienced politician, but his barrage of affairs and divorces make Kim Kardashian look like a spokesperson for successful marriage. Add to that the fact that he is more of a flip-flopper on issues than Romney, as well as his bizarre, angry white guy proclamations – such as his latest push of ending child labor laws because poor children have no one around them that has a work ethic – and it becomes clear that Gingrich is not just out of touch with modern America, he’s not even within shouting distance.

And while Tebow is obviously a very talented athlete, his quarterbacking abilities are abysmal. He has virtually no field vision and the passing game obviously moves far too fast for him to react. He often looks like a punter trying to make a throw on a trick play rather than a starting quarterback. And while it’s worked thus far against mediocre competition, an option quarterback just has no place in the modern NFL.

Keep in mind, the differences between the two are greater than the similarities. Tebow is a likable young man who is earnest in his religious beliefs. He has natural leadership skills – make no mistake, the Broncos have become a better football team solely due to him.

Gingrich, on the other hand, is about as unlikable a person as exists in America today. His religious beliefs – he’s a Catholic now, by the way – are completely transparent and self-serving. His leadership abilities have wrecked his own party and created political discourse that makes schoolyard taunting look like an MIT lecture. The GOP is a worse party, solely due to him.

In the end, we are currently watching a lousy quarterback win NFL games and a lousy politician lead the GOP field. But one thing can be said with the utmost certainty – both Gingrich and Tebow will see their seasons end in humiliating defeat.

–WKW

The GOP’s Elite Eight – Now more than ever

We cannot allow this to end.

My friends, we are living in a special time and it is up to us to get as much out of it as we possibly can. The current field for the GOP nomination for the Presidency is a group that can only be defined as “special.” And we may start losing them.

Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Ron Paul, Rick Perry, Michele Bachmann, Jon Huntsman, Rick Santorum and Herman Cain have been the only thing that has kept America from falling into a complete depression – mentally, not economically, mind you. This group of Republicans has helped America in so many ways. And we are nearing a time when some of them may start dropping out. So now it is our turn to help them.

Cain – who led in the polls as recently as a few weeks ago – may be the first to go. Apparently blindsided by the fact that 13-year affairs don’t magically disappear when you begin a political campaign, Cain has spoken of “reassessing” his campaign. This, as we all know, is code for “How can I get out of this.”

Still, Cain is showing the gumption to keep going. The multiple accusations of sexual harassment haven’t slowed Cain, and it’s possible the allegations of a long “friends with benefits” relationship with Ginger White won’t stop him either. Cain has lashed out, releasing child-like maps that are supposed to showcase his foreign policy chops (Brazil? A friend!) and firing away at his critics, claiming that Democrats and liberals are are afraid of him.

And he speaks the truth. We are afraid of Cain. Afraid that he’ll drop out of the race. In fact, we’re afraid of losing any of the GOP contenders. We are in the midst of a once-in-a-lifetime event. The GOP’s Elite Eight is akin to Haley’s Comet flying by during a solar eclipse while the Chicago Cubs win the World Series.

Much like a boy band, each of these candidates holds a special niche:

Romney: The hot one who just wants to be respected for his ever-changing mind.

Gingrich: The angry one with horrifying morals who will likely be spitting on voters before the end.

Cain: The funny, yet super-troubled and possibly dangerous one.

Perry: The drunk one.

Paul: The wacky one who lives in a separate reality but has a cult of fans who live in that same separate reality.

Huntsman: The one in the suit.

Bachmann: The nutjob religoid.

Santorum: The nutjob religoid.

Ok, there may be more nutjob religoids in this group than in your average boy band, but I’m on a roll here so just overlook that.

As individuals, each one of these candidates is a train wreck of horror. But put them together, and they sing, baby. Somehow, all the anger, self-righteousness and ignorance meshes together into a symphony of stupid. Every GOP debate is must-see TV. They are like “Keeping Up With The Kardashians” but with far less intellectuality and ethics. And the best part is, they all assume we are laughing with them, when we are all just laughing at them.

This is why Americans of all stripes must come together and encourage all of them to stay in the race for the long haul. We must send letters, e-mails and text messages of support. We cannot lose a single one of them. Not now. Not when we need them most.

My friends, eventually there will be just one GOP candidate. And that candidate will somehow lose the general election to Barack Obama by 600 or so electoral votes as new states will spontaneously emerge just to vote against whoever the GOP offers up to slaughter.

Ok, maybe we can afford to lose Huntsman. But the others must stay on at least until the GOP Convention in Sept. 2012. Better yet, we need them all to stay in the race with the belief they may win.

Howard Gold called the Elite Eight “the single worst field of presidential candidates a major party has put forward in 50 years.” Gold is both correct and incorrect in this opinion. Sure, not a single one of them has a chance to win a race for county dog catcher, let alone the Presidency. But for those of us who revel in seeing a group of people far stupider and more evil than ourselves, the Elite Eight is pure win.

It is up to all of us to keep all of them in the race, for as long as possible. Ok, maybe not Huntsman. I still have no idea why he even ran in the first place. But the rest of them we need. Stay the course, Lady and Gentlemen. We need you. Now more than ever.

–WKW

 

This is the story of the Herman Cain

Fireworks shot through the Internet night
Enter stage left came Ginger White
She sees him struggling at a GOP Debate
Cries out “My God he’ll rule us all”
Here comes the story of the Herman Cain
The man so many women came to blame
For something that he says he never done
Put him even with Santorum but one time he could-a been
The President of the world.

Three other ladies there does Ginger see
And other women moving around mysteriously
“I didn’t do it” he says and he throws up his hands
“We were just friends I hope you understand
I’m a good Christian” he says and he frets
But one of them called up Gloria Allred
She arrives on the scene and the red lights flash
For a man who sold pizza to make his cash.

Meanwhile far away in another part of town
Herman Cain has no idea about foreign policy
Number one contender for the Presidency
Had no idea what kinda shit was about to go down
When Wolf Blitzer asked if he did cheat
Just like the time before and the time before that
In Washington that’s just the way things go
If you’re a phony the Press you should not meet
‘Less you wanna draw the heat.

Herman could take a man out with just one line
But he never did like to talk about nothing but 999
It will work he’d say and it would add to my pay
But those sexual harassment charges have never gone away

Now all the contenders in their coats and their ties
Are free to drink martinis and watch the sun rise
While Herman sits in his own private hell
A guilty man who couldn’t keep vows to his wife
That’s the story of the Herman Cain
And he’ll never be able to clear his name
And undo the damage he’s done
He’s dropping out of the race today but he could-a been
The President of the world.

HT Bob Dylan

 

–WKW

The difference between slavery and paying taxes

Some enjoy comparing paying federal income taxes to slavery. Herman Cain being the latest. There are differences between the two, however. For instance:

 

Our tax code is not the 21st century version of slavery. Slavery is slavery.

–WKW

Libertarianism: The absence of thought

There are no great libertarian thinkers. Libertarianism is the absence of thought.

Lately, libertarianism has gained some weird popularity in the U.S. Sort of like Garbage Pail Kids did, but more offensive and less intellectual. Somehow, a growing group of maniacs has decided that things like paying taxes and making sure their handicapped grandma doesn’t die is an affront to their personal liberty.

I used to go by the theory that there are no homeless libertarians, but now I realize that was in error. The homeless are the quintessential libertarians, with no freedom-sapping things like shelter or clothing taking away from their personal freedom of licking the cheese off a three-day-old McDonald’s wrapper.

Libertarianism is like Scientology in that it’s a huge scam with a cult following of people who have completely lost the ability to think for themselves. Also, both libertarians and Scientologists believe in space aliens and that “Battlefield Earth” was Barry Pepper’s best work.

In the U.S., libertarians are under some bizarre fantasy that State governments somehow are better than the federal government. This fantasy is formed by being utterly ignorant to the current plight of states and the stupidity of state laws. Hell, why stop at States. How about we just live under City laws. Or better yet, let your neighborhood make all the rules. That way, you can have neighborhoods that have legalized dog fights and pedophilia. You know, Liberty.

And don’t even start with the, “Well, the Founding Fathers said … ” stuff. As soon as you have writings of the Founding Fathers talking about a nation of 300 million people with 50 states and run by mega-corporations, we’ll talk.

Libertarianism is a lot like the movie “Human Centipede” in that everyone involved is completely full of shit and it’s never actually been done in real life

Libertarianism was originally known as Anarchist Communism, because it essentially takes the worst of two hideous and failed ideologies, smooshes them together and calls it a philosophy. Human civilization has never tried libertarianism as a ruling ideology because humans aren’t, by and large, selfish and soulless monsters. Also, because it’s the type of ideology a 13-year-old comes up with when they’re angry that their parents make them mow the lawn.

Libertarians believe that masturbating in front of a mirror is the purest form of sex because it’s all you, baby.

Libertarians essentially believe that those who fall through the cracks of capitalism will be taken care of by charities. Because God knows, the majority of Americans who work 18-hour days for $2 an hour will spend their off hours working at soup kitchens and giving free appendix surgery to those who need it but can’t afford it. A libertarian regime would just mean we’d need to get used to wading through dead bodies to get to work. Because it would infringe upon our liberties to bury anyone who’s not you.

Libertarians believe the purest form of death is putting a bullet in your own head. Because you were free to own a gun and eat a bullet to get away from the nightmare of libertarianism.

Libertarianism is the belief that the poor of the United States aren’t suffering enough.

That so many people have seen how capitalism and unfettered free markets affect the common person and yet still consider it a perfect economic system can only mean one thing – that libertarians are just Republicans that have grown embarrassed in calling themselves Republicans. It’s not an ideology. It’s a way for rich people to sit back, feel superior and enjoy watching poor people fight to the death over a scrap of gristle.

Libertarians don’t have any idea what in the hell liberty or freedom mean. They are just a bunch of assholes who don’t want to pay taxes and want to get stoned and watch people who earn less than them wither and die.

In an era of winner-take-all capitalism, libertarianism is not just moronic. It’s evil.

–WKW

Breaking: Super Committee loses its Heartbeat

Don Johnson sent to find it.

–WKW

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